police:

heart:

there’s a police officer eating at the restaurant I’m at and I’m thinking about how I could get arrested for all the crimes I’ve done but I’m not

think again bitch you’re under arrest. your pasta looked good by the way

(via zackisontumblr)

heart:

winter is great because I can always wear huge sweaters and nobody has to know if I’m wearing a bra or not

(via zackisontumblr)

crrabs:

*tries to get eight hours sleep in 3 hours*

(via heliolisk)

piaduowes:

[ whispers ] musicals

[ huffs ] musicals

[ mutters ] musicals

[ clears throat ] musiCALS

[ raises voice ] muSICALS

[ wails ] MUsicALS

[ runs off, swims an ocean, climbs the mount everest ] [ shouts at the top of my lungs ] MUSICALS

(via davdan1212)

waitinforthebus:

ollivander:

THIS IS A REAL SIGN I JUST PASSED DANNY DEVITO FOR MAYOR

the gang runs for office 

waitinforthebus:

ollivander:

THIS IS A REAL SIGN I JUST PASSED
DANNY DEVITO FOR MAYOR

the gang runs for office 

(via samapitongzabala)

mr-mononucleosis:

lunalovegouda:

The intro cards for Futurama have always been one of my favorite parts of the show because people always talk about the old Simpson’s couch gag but this is just pure gold… I mean-

It goes from everything from 

image

image

and then they made fun of how much everyone reacted to the the infamous ‘dead dog episode’ that I cried about…

image

image

image

And then one time when the show got canceled…

image

and then when it came back..

image

you’re missing my favorite one though

image

(via davdan1212)

theredbookofwesteros:

quinnfabary:

I think my dad heard me crying cause he just cracked open my door and slid a piece of cake on the floor into my room

 

(via ugly)

(via ugly)

earthnation:

is being ignored a hobby

(via zackisontumblr)

valhallamage:

rlaph:

when you delete someone’s number then they text you and don’t wanna ask who it is

reblog to save a life,… or just to prevent an unwanted conversation

valhallamage:

rlaph:

when you delete someone’s number then they text you and don’t wanna ask who it is

reblog to save a life,… or just to prevent an unwanted conversation

(via davdan1212)

zackisontumblr:

that one friend that you love but texting them is like hitting yourself in the face with a brick over and over

(via zackisontumblr)

pizzoner:

I imagine bumping into my internet friends on the street like “sor-YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

(via ugly)

black-riverkiller:

lospaziobianco:

The Fairly OddParents: Channel Chasers

Best idea ever

(via ruinedchildhood)

(via heliolisk)